Numbness

Ministry is a costly field, in consideration of vocation. It has the appearance of a holy and sanctified work, but an issue arises when we concede that the work is done by unholy and unrighteousness people. To work and to be compensated for labors involving church administration, teaching, discipleship, counseling, etc., is a difficulty only when it causes us to become numb to its realities. Ministers have the constant battle of whether to fall into the trap of lethargy or spiritual discipline. They are judged unintentionally by their outward appearance; therefore, they must maintain an edifying image before their congregation. When a minister is not living and breathing, being sustained, and rejoicing in Christ and the Holy Scriptures, he can quickly and softly deviate from honesty. It causes ministry to lose foundation. Any edifice constructed on this crumbling foundation will also become weak and falter. The flock of which he is the shepherd will become confused and will break away. It is so enticing to maintain a good front while one is dying on the inside. This is a man's livelihood and his family's livelihood, after all. But he must acknowledge that he answers to a mighty and Holy God, and he is doing God's work. He has to maintain his relationship with the Lord for his own sake, for his family's sake, for his career's sake, for his congregation's sake, but most importantly, for Christ's sake.

Doctrines That Divide

I heard a pastor, bearing a reputation of being a bit controversial and divisive, discuss with his congregation the process of finding a common ground while not becoming soft on important doctrinal truths. He referred to the attitude as open-handed/close-handed, where we ought to grasp tightly and unshakably over important biblically-saturated doctrines while staying open and relenting on every other practice or belief. As far as how much compromise of doctrine should occur in the name of cooperation or the protection from division, I would purport: none at all. Each church should have an understanding of what doctrines are most vital and maintain those views with conviction, all the while understanding that some of their perspectives are unique to their congregation and may not be necessarily accepted by other churches. Foundational doctrine principles should never be compromised, even if it means division. But not everything is a foundational doctrine principle. Falling into either camp is wrong.

As for the use of politics in the church, I disagree with any use of political power or influence unless there is a disunity between doctrinal beliefs and the actual Word of God, as adhered to by the saints and the Church at large. However, as quickly as I say that, I feel I need to check myself by saying that no agenda should have to be pushed through by the use of political prowess within the church. If there is a disharmony over an important aspect of church administration, instruction, missions work, or doctrine, there should be no need for civil war. Again, checking myself, we also cannot allow heresy to build up in the Church. It needs to be cut back just like weeds in a garden. Every single "agenda" or idea, belief, or practice, has to stand up to the tightest scrutiny of biblical instruction and mandate. It's a tricky, fuzzy exercise at times, but completely necessary.

The Influence of the Baptists

The history of the rise of the Baptist denomination reveals some interesting events and changes in the common theological outlook among peoples of the US and those from around the world. Even at its inception, the Baptist "trend" brought with it powerful and very influential ideas that would forever shape Christianity's doctrinal landscape. The first foundation of Baptist thought that I found to be particularly important was illustrated by Helwys' emigration from Amsterdam back to England so that he could plant a Baptist church. He was motivated by the ideology that each person should be offered the opportunity to read and interpret the Scriptures for themselves, rather than depend on a Pope or any other church authority for Scriptural instruction. This is an essential element of the contemporary Baptist church which still stands firm to this day. It is vital for the Church to be saturated in Scripture, especially as it pertains to each member's unique study of the Word of God. The second element arising from the events of Baptist denominational formation that I feel is particularly important to take note of is the emphasis that was placed on foreign missions. With the rise of key figures such as Lottie Moon and Annie Armstrong, organizations were birthed in order to satisfy global missions needs. Because of their influence in the Baptist denomination, the Baptist Church has experienced wide and rampant growth. Even today, Baptist churches all over the world benefit from foreign missions organizations that grew out of the Baptist movement, and in particular from a few key Baptist missionaries. The rise of the Baptist denomination has had a vast and meaningful impact on global Christianity. The most inspiring characteristic is that God continues to empower Baptist churches with this same mentality of mission-focused and Bible-reading discipleship today. To God be the glory.

Talking to Dad, but Ignoring My Brothers

As I was reading Buttrick's excerpts on the form of prayer, I was quickly struck with the realization that I pray selfishly. I often come to my Father in Heaven with the attitude that He is my Father. Yet, though I come honestly and often, I tend to neglect both the reverence my God deserves and also the brothers and sisters that surround me. They need the prayers just as much as I need them, if not more. As a community, as a Church before Christ, I ought to not neglect the freedom of coming before the Lord with an honest and sincere heart; yet, I cannot forget to bring the hearts of his Church. My prayer takes form (it's not without a specific method), but my prayer lacks a love for the Church. When I pray, I ought to set aside myself and embrace the Lord first and foremost. In so doing, I will begin to realize that Jesus loves His Church. If I cannot pray for His Church, let along love His Church, then who am I to say that I love at all? Christ has loved me in order that I might love Him back, and also love His people. My prayers should reflect this truth.

Ceasing to Never Pray

I have a huge respect for men and women who pray. And not only do I respect them because they simply pray; I can pray, too. I respect them because they pray intentionally, faithfully, powerfully, consistently. They don't waste their words, they don't waste their time, they don't speak irreverently. Their lives are sustained by the hours they spend each day in holy fellowship with their Father in Heaven.

I am at fault--and at a point of conviction. I spend miserable moments in prayer. The moments are few. They cease. When I pray, I often lose focus, intention, purpose, and in turn lose power, effectiveness, change of heart and mind. I acknowledge a God, but I cannot seem to sit still and await His voice of power. If there were ineffective moments in my day, they are most certainly those times when I am pretending to pray and instead turning them into 15-minute nap intervals. And yet, it would be an easier battle if this were the only difficulty, but it's not. Most often, I choose not to go to my knees in submission to God and His presence. I push it away and vow to do it later, only to be found a liar once more. D. Martyn Llloyd-Jones wrote on prayer, and his advice continues to cling to the back of mind. He emphasized a dire need for believers to heed the call of the Lord when He commands us to pray. When my Father speaks, no matter how quiet or unnecessary I deem it, I MUST answer His call and go to my Father and King in Heaven, for He wants me to listen. If I could pray without ceasing, if I could only begin to pray, than my minutes and hours each day could never be considered ineffective. My will would be submitted to His purpose. What greater calling each sun-tipped morning than the beckoning of my Father to my knees before His Good and Holy Throne of Love.

Soft Hearts and Strong Minds

Academia was never my identity, but I strove to master it. I love books, heavy thoughts, deep and honest discussion, analytical and emotionally dissociated study, all of it. From my perspective, particularly before I came to ETBU, nothing was more important than knowledge: I need to be accurate, quick, well-versed. I have to have sound doctrine, a deep well of eclectic information, and an array of insights and experiences. I was (and admittedly still am) very intentional about forming my “tough mind”.

Yet, I've read 1^st Corinthians. I have a hard time ignoring that pesky chapter 13. Without love, I am nothing. What Jonathan Edwards is so famous for is his superior mind, coupled with an incredible love for people and a broken heart before the throne of the Lord. He is accredited one of the greatest American minds to have ever lived, yet his ability to remain soft to the calling of the Lord and the ministry to which he was to work diligently and faithfully was what made him great. My greatest lesson (and it's still in progress) is one of softness. It's been easy to allow my mind to harden my heart to both my Father in heaven and to the people around me. But I'm called to something less natural, something more honorable, something Christ-like. I am to pursue my studies and soften my heart for the sake of the people around, ultimately for the glory of God.

Prayer Perspective

I don't pop out of bed all that often. Mostly, I will gurgle, moan, roll over, sigh, lean up, moan again, and lay back down. This morning was one of those mornings, getting up extra early and all. It was rough, but I really do enjoy being up early. The world is a pretty and pleasant place in the morning, even if I'm anything but. I admit, I had to have some prayer time before I was even able to have a good attitude about going to church and hour earlier than usual. But when I got to the church, I was immediately thankful. It was the first official week for our new pastor, so there were already five or six men at work praying in the sanctuary. That was incredibly sobering for me. I was, in a sense, required to be here and so I came. These men chose to be here to pray for their new pastor; no one was making them. I was ashamed and encouraged at the same time.

Rather than join those men in the sanctuary, I retreated to the college ministry class, where I teach on Sundays, to spend my time with the Lord. Again, I was struck with how simple it was to be doing what I was doing, and yet convicted by how resistant I've been to the notion of coming early to “pray over the church”. As a teacher, I was embarrassed by how lightly I've been treating my position, as well as my independent attitude, particularly as it regards prayer. I spent the morning thinking about the college students that will be coming through that door, praying for them and asking God to empower me with His love and wisdom. The greatest thing that came from that time in prayer, however, was that my heart was properly conditioned to the Cross. Often I come into class with a noisy soul, cluttered and ineffective. But that hour of prayer completely changed my perspective on the lesson, on the people, and on the truths that God was revealing to our class. It was an eye-opening experience I fully intend to replicate in the future.

I'm Proud of My Humility

I was considering John of the Cross's list of virtues, and I was simply embarrassed at how easy it was to identify which I thought I needed the most of. I am in need of humility in absolutely everything. If there is reason to boast, I ascribe that reason to myself. I count all of my "good spiritual works" as pats on the back, as crowns for my head. The most dreadful attitude to have of my standing with God is the very thing I typify. I am God in my own mind. Honestly, I'm annoyed that I'm even admitting it. I need humility. Not soft, fun humility. I need that humility that punches you in the gut, strips you naked, and has you fall on your face in shame. I am proud of my "humility". I have cheapened Grace. I have cheapened the Cross.

Mr. Landon Price

So I read this post with a simple title: 3 Prayer Requests. I was like, "Yeah, alright. We'll see how this plays out." I began reading through the list of what this guy wants most from God, and I was humbled immediately. I like to think I love Christ, and that my love for Him defines me, but at times that is just simply not true. It was so encouraging to read about a brother in Christ and his desire to know the Lord deeply and intimately, so much so that it changes his very nature. Our calling as believers is to love Jesus more than we can loving anything else--even ourselves! What I desire I have to pray for such a longing as Mr. Price. To love Christ is to know Him, and to be changed into His image every single day.

The "Talking Cure"

Failure to conceal is the evil one's greatest torment, for once darkness has been brought to light, the glory of the Lord makes all things new. I knew this far too well in my own life. Evil has had its small victories over me for years and years. I clenched onto my struggles and shortcomings, yet the tighter I gripped the worse I was afflicted by pain and suffering. To combat it, and contrary to my personality, I pursued an accountability partner in order to set myself free from my bondage. What I discovered, however, was that the accountability group did not set me free. Confessing the darkness did not wash it away. It was Christ. By my act of obedience to Him he made me clean. He gave me rest. He gave me peace. I could let go.

Genie in a Bottle

I do not know the God whom I serve very well at all, though I am not very proud to admit it. When I became a professing believer of the Gospel, one of my first prayers before my Lord was a request for wisdom and understanding. I have longed for a greater understanding of the world around me, the importance of relationships, and of the person of Jesus Christ. I will admit that at times I hesitate to pray for wisdom, for wisdom often follows a hardship which sows seeds of wisdom in our souls. Yet, without trials, we can never grow intimate with our Father in Heaven. And that, intimacy with the King of kings, is another desire I have had ever since my profession of faith. If nothing else, I want to be held close by my Lord; comforted, secured, provided for, close with. But above these two desires is one final longing which I even have difficulty articulating, and that is the swift fulfillment of God's Kingdom on earth. Far surpassing any acquisition of personal wisdom for my own sake, far deeper than any intimacy between the Lord and me alone, is the longing for His bringing His Kingdom, establishing His throne, reigning and ruling for now and for ever more. If I could offer up one prayer above all else, it would be this: "Our Father who is in Heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your willing be done, on earth as it is in Heaven."